Don't Terrify Birds

Does that bird not look petrified? Apparently, keas are horrified by food.

Prohibited Items on JetStar Flights

No Furbies.

No pagers (or is that a Tamagotchi?)...neither just to be safe.

No walkie-talkies.

No old-school Nokia phones.

No dial radios.

Many People Have Died

Don't sit on the fence because it has caused deaths.

Also, I love that there's an "injury or death" warning at many sites you see in Australia.

Seductive Grapes

Loose grapes can cause STDs.

Bridge Safety

Carry one ice skate across the bridge while the other floats behind you.

Sweatband Ban

No sweatbands while riding a bike.

When the Road is Clear

My bad, I thought I'd run out in high traffic.

Water Safety

You may stand or float in the water, but do not squat or dive onto submerged rocks.

Forgot Anything????

They seem very adamant. Check out the ALL CAPS YELLING and the number of question marks and exclamation points!!!!!!

Sounds Like a Challenge

But you could leap-frog it, or maybe pole vault.

Broken Windshields

Rocks will fly up if you try passing without lines.

Inflatable Tutu

Children can be strapped into inflatable tutus for full-contact ballet.

You Could Tip Over

No balancing on your head.

Cows Eat Cars

Cows in the Atherton Tablelands get the munchies and prefer cars.

No Headless Dogs

Your dog must have its head attached.